Terry, I’m a retired teacher in my mid-60s living on my pension and savings. I’m not eligible for Social Security. My 94-year-old father, who had a healthy portfolio — I know, because we went over it in 2010 — fell in love with his 78-year-old nurse, moved in with her, cut me off and threatened legal action if I interfered (so I didn’t), and now has no money left. He wants me to help him, but I feel I need to worry about my own finances should I live into my 80s or beyond. What is the right thing to do here?
Thank you for any advice you can give me.
Terry Says: OK, this is a moral question, not a financial one. But I can’t resist asking: Where is the nurse now? It sort of reminds me of my grandmother saying” there’s no fool like an old fool!”
If you want my “moral” answer, you should refer your father to the senior services offerings of your state, and if he cannot afford to live at home anymore or is unable to care for himself, the state Medicaid department will provide care in a state-funded nursing home.
As they say on the airplanes, put your oxygen mask on first, before helping others!